Thursday, April 7, 2011

If I Were a Dog What Would I Say?

First of all, this is a dangerous question because I most certainly have antagonists who already have a smart ass answer prepared for me.  Sticks and stones...

If I were Tulip, the two year old female Shih Tzu, I would tell Tank, the two year old male Lhasa Apso, to stop doing the "nasty" at mama's feet this early in the morning.  Come on!  Let her have just a few minutes of peace, PLEASE!

In this particular household it would be the following:

  • I do not like that younger boy's chunky, clunky fingers around my neck at any time of the day.  I need my space.  He may pet me gently between the hours of 8:40am and 2:30pm Mondays through Fridays.  School?  Oh, that's too bad.  Well, then his visiting hours will have to wait for school holidays or summer vacation and then we'll have to work out some sort of compromise.
  • Those other two wild beasts can not be on the bed at any time during my nap.  The room must be dark and I don't want to hear Tulip's snoring.  It can be very disturbing.  I must also have my own pillow free of drool and tree bark.
  • My food bowl and its contents belongs to ME!
  • Those two flying things in the other room frighten me and squawk every time I walk by.  I have a feeling I scare them too.  Maybe it's my eyes?  Perhaps my tongue?  Well, I can't help that.  I'll just stay clear of them to be on the safe side.
  • I like that yellow, chewy, t-bone squeaky toy.  I claim that as my own.  Don't touch it!
  • I've been told that I'm one of the ugliest dogs in the world but I'm beautiful.  I'm loved and I'm safe and that's all that matters.  No one or thing is ugly as long as they're loved.



Pat said...

Ugly is subjective. I, for one, think Pamela Anderson is hideous.

Brenda said...

There are no ugly puppies ever!! However, I happen to agree with Pat. Pam Anderson is nasty.