Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Does Anyone Know Bill Gates?

Did anyone hear it yesterday afternoon?  The deep, low exhale of air from me and Eric's frightening howl which sounded like a bear was shot in the ass?  Yes.  It was loud and painful and the noises are still reverberating from the Potts' household. 

You see, Eric and I plan and connive every year for at least 5 days alone together.  It's our quiet time.  Our peace.  Our solace.  Our recuperation and rejuvenation time. We look forward to it and go to great lengths in planning and preparing.

There was a fateful phone call yesterday afternoon at 4:30 pm Mountain Time.  A representative from Austynn's overnight summer camp, which is just three weeks away, called to say that Austy could not attend.  WHAT?!  Something or other about not having enough male volunteers.  This particular camp has a 2:1 ratio of children to adults and because of my kiddo's fear of heights, he would need someone specifically assigned to him.  But, she said, you can always "enroll him in another camp".  Really?!  It's too late in the season, doh!  Breaaathe.  Find my Zen.

I know some of you are thinking, poor kid.  Won't Austynn be disappointed?  It's not always about you, Bri.  Yes it is!  And no, Austy could care less about camp.  Breaaathe.  Deep, relaxing pool of crystal clear, sparkling, blue water... 

There is always the option of placing Austynn on a plane to visit family in California; however, there are a few issues with this.  One, financial.  Does any one have a connection to Bill GatesSix degrees of separation...that's all it takes.  Bill might like me or maybe he'll think Austy is a hoot.  Who knows?  Secondly, William and Austynn on a plane together without parental supervision would be devastating.  I'm certain I would hear about it on the evening news.  Something about an Air Marshal breaking up a fight between two out of control siblings over Nevada. Their parents would be requested to pick them up immediately.  Or finally, I could place them on separate flights but then there would the tragic report of an on-board suicide.  In this case, it would be the passenger forced to sit next to my Austy.  After the fiftieth "Ya know" comment, I would totally understand and feel completely responsible.

Perhaps we could drive him to visit my sister but then again, the idea of leaving him on her doorstep would be too great a temptation.  Besides, she'd probably know who did it. 

This morning, there are still no viable options for our quiet, 5-day annual retreat.  We will continue mulling and musing.  Listen carefully over the next few days.  Perhaps we can follow up from the earlier ugly noises to more placated, happy laughter-laden sounds.  Someone has got to know Bill Gates...!

1 comment:

Pat said...

I hate when someone throws a monkey wrench into the best-laid plans. :(