Tuesday, March 25, 2014

This is how it reeeaallly happened!

In a few weeks I'll be making a quick weekend trip home for some birthdays and to visit friends.  As with every visit, I'm preparing for the inevitable silly stories from my family centered around prat falls and humiliations.  I'm not the only one privy to the teasing.  My dad, whose been gone for some time now, is the central character of a lot of the stories.  We all get teased.  No one is immune.  This is what makes our family fun; the tall tales, the exaggeration and all the laughter which accompanies it.  I was sharing a couple of these goofy adventures with my husband when I thought, "There are always two sides of these mishaps and why is it that no one ever hears my side?"  Haha!  Today my side will finally be heard.

It's a misnomer that I get sick on anything that moves.  Not so!  This fable was concocted during my teenage years while vacationing with my family in Maui, Hawaii.  The initial experience involved a small chartered Cessna.  My mother thought it would be fun to have the family fly over the beautiful, mountainous island of Kauai in a 6-seater plane.  Let me repeat, "mountainous island of Kauai".  This is crucial information for the story and of which my siblings always fail to explain when retelling it. Our lovely family outing was not so enjoyable for me.  I've explained in prior blogs that I don't particularly like travelling by air.  Imagine my delight in being flung about in a small aluminium can due to severe turbulence.  Yes, my breakfast found the vomit bag; however, it seems to me I saw other green faces too.  Was it the turbulence making them sick or was it their reaction to my predicament?  I'll never know.  I hope, for retribution sake, it was the latter.

Another piece of history shared at family get-togethers (and why this is - I don't know - it's gross), revolves around my becoming ill on a chartered catamaran in Maui during a different vacation.  My mother wanted us to have an amazing experience - and it truly was.  This particular trip was too windy and the sea too rough to have the boat bring us to our destination of a neighboring island.  Instead, the crew gave us a beautiful three hour tour (no reference at all to the Professor and Maryann) off the Maui coastline.  (If some of this story sounds familiar, there's another silly piece to it which required a blog entirely of its own.)  It was beautiful trip.  We jumped the waves, flying through the air.  My sister, Ellenmary, and I even stood at the tip of one of the bows...yes, yes, visions from the movie, Titanic..we were flying.  They took that scene from us and Leonardo DiCaprio wasn't even born yet.

At this point the heckling turns to me.  Who got sick?  That's right, moi.  I was leaning over the ropes downwind so I would not "hit" anyone.  I've never been able to explain this part of the story.  Here's my chance. The reason I was ill was that we were lying out getting tans and I asked a crew member for a towel to cover my face.  The towel smelled like vomit.  I'm sorry, but rocking back and forth on a boat with the smell of someone else's sickness is not conducive to a positive experience.

Just for the record Ellenmary, Paul, Kathleen, and Jimmy; I have never gotten sick on a train, tour bus, ferry, dinner cruise, large aircraft, or in the car while mom has been driving.

....so there.  I'll see you in a couple of weeks.  Bring it on.